Custody issues can be some of the most difficult to resolve. Once you’ve gone through a custody hearing, you may think the worst is over. But your battle may have just begun if your spouse refuses to follow the court’s orders. There’s a lot you can do if your spouse is violating custody arrangements. However, it’s important to avoid some of the common pitfalls and go through the proper channels. Whatever you do, don’t try to enforce custody orders on your own.
What Are Temporary Orders?
Nearly every divorce or custody case will involve some form of temporary orders. Like it sounds, a “temporary order” is an interim order that is controlling as long as your divorce is pending or until the court issues a final order. Even though they’re not permanent, temporary orders are just as binding as a permanent order.
Your final custody order may change from the temporary order. For example, your spouse may have been awarded sole physical custody under the temporary order, but may end up sharing custody under the final order. You and your spouse’s willingness to follow the temporary order will affect your custody outcome at trial.
What Can I Do When My Spouse Violates the Court Order?
Remember that the court, not you, enforces custody orders. Although it may feel like your spouse is violating custody arrangements to get back at you, don’t make the situation worse by firing back. For example, if your spouse refuses to return your child on the date specified in the order, don’t drop your child off late to the next custody exchange to make up for it. Your efforts to equalize the situation will only backfire. Your best response to your spouse’s custody and visitation violations should be to file a pretrial motion to enforce the custody order.
Keep a detailed record of:
- custody exchanges
- the dates your child's other parent misses visitation
- the dates your child's other parent interferes with your visitation, and
- you offering your spouse make-up time.
If you end up filing a motion informing the court that your spouse is in contempt (violation) of the court’s temporary orders, you can offer your visitation records as evidence of what's been happening. The judge may admonish your spouse or can impose sanctions, like fines and even jail time depending on the severity of the violation. The judge may also modify the parenting schedule or even change the custody arrangement if your spouse has repeatedly violated court orders.
Will My Spouse’s Violations Affect Custody?
When judges decide custody, they always consider each parent’s willingness to encourage a relationship between the child and other parent. If your spouse interferes with your ability to visit or speak with your children, you may have good cause to ask the court to adjust custody in the final custody order. If your ex regularly misses visitation or has abandoned the children, you may be able to ask for an official reduction to visitation—and an increase to child support the other parent pays—in order to reflect the true amount of time your ex spends with the children.
Since a child’s best interests are central to any custody decision, a judge will also look at each parent’s emotional stability and ability to meet the child’s needs. You and your spouse’s willingness to work with one another shows your willingness to put your child’s needs before your own. Your ex spouse’s clear and repeated violations of a temporary order will impact final custody in your case.
Questions for Your Attorney
- What can I do if my spouse isn’t letting me see my child?
- My spouse mostly follows the temporary custody orders, but regularly shows up 30 minutes late to visits and requests make-up time. Do I have to accommodate these continued requests?
- How will my custody violations affect my chances at final custody?