Getting a divorce can be overwhelming. You’re thrust into an unfamiliar court system, forced to review and sometimes sign strange documents filled with legal jargon, and everything seems to take forever.
Understanding the timeline of events in a typical divorce can help set realistic expectations and reduce your frustration. Although the process may vary from state to state, the overall structure of a case will be roughly the same. (To learn how long it could take to get through all these steps in your divorce—and what could slow things down—see the results of our survey on how long divorce takes.)
1. You or Your Spouse Decide to Divorce.
This may seem very basic, but it’s an important step in the process. You and your spouse may decide together or separately that you need to divorce. Once you’ve committed to a divorce, you’ll begin to advocate for yourself by searching for and hiring an experienced family law attorney.
2. Both Spouses Begin to Collect Paperwork and Information.
This is another important preliminary step. When you know you’re going to divorce, you need to start gathering information like bank account statements, insurance policies, retirement account information, mortgages, and medical records. You should also start keeping a detailed budget. You and your lawyer will need this information to meet your disclosure obligation and develop a strategy for your case.
3. You or Your Spouse File for Divorce.
The case doesn’t officially begin until one spouse drafts a divorce petition (also known as a complaint), serves it on the other party, and files everything with the court. The petition will be drafted somewhat broadly and won’t go into great detail about your case, but it will give notice to the other spouse that the divorce is beginning.
4. The Other Spouse Files a Response to the Petition.
After you serve or your spouse serves and files the petition, the other spouse needs to prepare an answer (also known as a response). The answer must be filed and served within a time frame prescribed individually by each state, usually lasting around 20 days.
If a responding spouse fails to answer by the deadline, the filing spouse may be able to obtain a default judgment, which would allow the judge to grant the divorce and give the filing spouse everything that was sought in the complaint, unless a judge awards extra time to submit an answer.
5. The Court May Require Mediation.
Most state courts will require the parties to undergo non-binding mediation near the beginning of the case in an effort to resolve some or all of the issues, keep the case out of the courts, and free up clogged judicial calendars. People who have been in abusive relationships are normally not required to mediate with an abusive spouse.
If the court has a mediation requirement, and one or both spouses refuse to comply, the court may postpone their case or otherwise sanction (fine) them.
6. The Spouses Engage in Discovery.
Both parties can ask each other to provide information and documents or to submit to depositions and evaluations. There are strict deadlines for turning over information in a timely fashion. Failing to provide requested documents and information, and failure to appear at scheduled depositions, can result in substantial sanctions, including attorneys' fees, postponements, and court costs.
7a. The Parties Should Negotiate from the Beginning to the End of the Case.
It’s somewhat misleading to label negotiation as number seven on the timeline, because fruitful, open-minded negotiation is something that both spouses should be undertaking at all times. There’s no deadline to settle a case—cases can be settled even on the day of trial. It’s not even required that you settle the whole case; you can settle some issues and go to trial on the others. The judge will expect both sides to have worked as hard as they can to settle a case before convening a trial. If the spouses didn’t negotiate in good faith, the judge will not be pleased.
7b. If the Spouses Reach a Settlement Agreement, They Submit It to the Court.
If the parties have successfully reached a full or partial divorce settlement agreement, they will give it to the judge for approval. Sometimes there will be a brief hearing where the settlement is read into the record, while in other cases the judge may simply review it and sign it without a hearing.
8. If the Case Isn’t Settled, It Goes to Trial.
At trial, the lawyers will call witnesses to testify and will present other evidence into the record, including portions of depositions, evaluations, bank statements, and financial records. Each witness will give direct testimony for one lawyer and then be cross-examined by the other lawyer.
9. The Court Makes a Decision and Issues a Written Divorce Decree.
After hearing all the witnesses and reviewing the evidence, the judge will research and apply the law to the facts of the case. The court will issue a final written judgment—also known as a divorce decree—which will be binding on both spouses after the divorce. The court's written opinion should explain the facts as the court determined them, and lay out the law that the judge applied to govern the case. The judgment will contain all of the terms that both spouses must meet.
10. Either Spouse May Appeal Some or All of the Judgment and Decree.
If either or both spouses disagree with any part of the judge’s decision, they may appeal the case pursuant to their state judicial branch’s rules of appellate court.